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A blond named Barbara appeared on Who Wants to be a Millionaire. ...

Regis: "Barbara, you've done very well so far, $500,000 and one lifeline left--phone a friend. The next question will give you the first ever million dollars if you get it right.... But if you get it wrong you will drop back to $32,000...are you ready?"

Barbara: "Sure I'll have a go."

Regis: "Which of the following birds does not build its own nest? Is it...A-Robin, B-Sparrow, C-Cuckoo or D-Thrush Remember, Barbara, it's worth 1 million dollars."

Barbara: "Oh, gees, that's simple.... it's a cuckoo.."

Regis: "You're sure? You can stick on $500,000 or play on for the million."

Barbara: "I want to play; I'll go with C-Cuckoo."

Regis: "Is that your final answer?"

Barbara: "It is"

Regis: "Are you confident?"

Barbara: "Absolutely"

Regis: "Barbara, you had $500,000 and you said C-Cuckoo. Well....you' re right! You have just won 1 MILLION DOLLARS!!!! Here is your check. You have been a great contestant and a real gambler. Audience please put your hands together for Barbara."

That night Barbara calls her friend Carol and they go to a local bar for a celebration drink.

As they are sipping champagne, Carol turns to Barbara and asks, "Tell me, how in God's name did you know that it was the cuckoo that does not build its own nest?" "Get real!"

Barbara replies, "Everybody knows cuckoos live in clocks!"

 

Law of queue: If you change queues, the one you have left will start to move faster than the one you are in now.

 

Law of the Telephone: When you dial a wrong number, you never get an engaged tone.

 

Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.

 

Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

 

Law of the Alibi: If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a flat tire.

 

Bath THEOREM: When the body is immersed in water, the telephone rings.

 

LAW OF ENCOUNTERS: The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

 

LAW of the RESULT: When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will!

 

LAW OF BIOMECHANICS: The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

 

THEATRE RULE: People with the seats at the furthest from the aisle arrive last.

 

LAW OF COFFEE: As soon as you sit down for a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

 

 

There were two childhood buddies who went through school and college and even joined the army together. War broke out and they were fighting in the same unit. One night they were ambushed.

Bullets were flying all over and out of the darkness came a voice, " Harry, please come and help me."

Harry immediately recognized the voice of his childhood buddy, Bill. He asked the captain if he could go.

The captain said, "No, I can't let you go, I am already short-handed and I cannot afford to lose one more person. Besides, the way Bill sounds he is not going to make it." Harry kept quiet.

Again the voice came, "Harry, please come and help me." Harry sat quietly because the captain had refused earlier.

Again and again the voice came.

Harry couldn't contain himself any longer and told the captain, "Captain, this is my childhood buddy. I have to go and help."

The captain reluctantly let him go. Harry crawled through the darkness and dragged Bill back into the trench. They found that Bill was dead.

Now the captain got angry and shouted at Harry, "Didn't I tell you he was not going to make it? He is dead, you could have been killed and I could have lost a hand. That was a mistake."

Harry replied, "Captain, I did the right thing. When I reached Bill he was still alive and his last words were 'Harry, I knew you would come ."'

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