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Q: How many Microsoft tech support people does it take to change a light bulb? A: We have an exact copy of the light bulb here, and it seems to be working fine. Can you tell me what kind of system you have? Okay. Now exactly how dark is it? Okay, there could be 4 or 5 things wrong...have you tried the light switch?... Read More

Q: Some people say God is Love. A: That is not a question. Please restate your query in the form of a question. Abort, Retry, Fail?... Read More

Q: Some people claim they hear the voice of God. Is this true? A: They are much more likely to receive e-mail.... Read More

Q: If I pray to God, will he listen? A: You can waste his time telling him what to do, or you can just get off his back and let him program.... Read More

Q: Will I be reincarnated? A: Not unless there is a special need to recreate you. And searching backup files is a major hassle, so if there is a request for you, God will just say that the tape has been lost.... Read More

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